2009的新愿望

等待。。。每天都在等待。有时候总觉得，在感情方面我很执著。心里好像在等着一个人，对择偶对象有条件。近几个月来，遇到不同的异性；类型有聪慧的、可爱的、帅气+娘的、老实的、乖乖的、怪怪的。。。后来发现其实自己的执著是因为到了现在，我对我的Mr.Right的想法越来越模糊了。女人和男人的相遇只是为了结婚和共度下半生吗？

看见有些人虽然有伴了，却担心那天他会变心。结婚了，怕老公会搞婚外情。好害怕！
虽然近期来有人主动出击，但是却被我冷漠的回应；打退堂鼓了！哈哈！我是犯贱的。

我不想因为到了某个阶段是时候找个人结婚生子，而宁滥忽缺。不管到了什么年龄，我都希望和喜欢的人在一起；而宁缺忽滥。

2009年的愿望：

1。 日语学习中级班（目前初级2班）
2。 认识新朋友
3。 正牌男朋友 （因为和男性朋友走在一起，被误以为是男朋友；市场也没了）
4。 台湾旅游和香港‘血拼’
5。 事业更上一层楼

每一个新年都会许下愿望，希望每天都过着从实写意的人生。朋友有相求，能帮的就帮忙。
等待。。。其实不一定是寂寞的，也可以很快乐。一切的结果都有自己控制，不一定要跟随他人的想法。
改变负面的思考和变得更积极，是我2008年一路走来得收获和成果。

绵绵细雨。。。还没停

今天终于痊愈了，一个星期后；我才康复。现在脑袋一片空白，舌头都没味觉了！

外面却下着绵绵细雨，整个人也变得懒洋洋。但是，时间滴答滴答的跑着。我还不能闲着呢！是时候为我脑袋瓜灌输增值。有时候想偷懒都不行，还是我一直都在偷懒。哈哈！

我并不期望当女强人，只求当个三餐温饱；健康快乐和家人及朋友和睦相处。

静下来回想在新公司的日子。算是安然无恙，压力渐渐增加。是因为市场的变动还是人事的改变。总觉得处处被针对，不让我休息片刻的机会；别人却可以随心所慾。

这是我想要的吗？这是我追求的吗？这是我拼了命都要保住的工作吗？

总觉得整个人被泼了冷水，一直都不能清醒。心中一股的热火，熄灭了！

我要到哪里寻回那份热情和冲劲？唉。。。雨还在下。。。

休息够了就该努力做工了，不然会变懒猪；猪虽然可爱，但是懒惰就很丑陋了！

现在下着雨，就像在英国的日子；冷冷的。。。淡淡的。。。好寂寞！

我真的很想再见到你

最近不断会想起，和你相遇的片段。不停的假设和你相遇的画面。
期待与你再次相遇，然后你带着我最爱的郁金香；说：“我回来了！”

我知道你移民了，你在那里好吗？？每天都梦想和你遇见的那一刻，应该感动万分！
因为我们相隔十年了，不晓得你变成什么样子。

最近有点点桃花运，但是都无法让我抬头仰望。
你的影子深深的烙印在我脑海里。

我在心里做好准备，如果无法再遇见你；哪怕最后错过了姻缘。。。我都心甘情愿！
幸福快乐是能够和喜欢的人牵着手，勉强在一起让时间来培养感情是痛苦。

有时候会假设，你变胖了、变坏了、变风流、变冷漠。。。。。。
其实想为自己找藉口，不再去想念你。

我要的是能让我心动的，刹那间的感觉打动了我！更奥妙的是我们是在同一天生日。小时候你总是站在我身后，非常安静的你；有时候都不知道你心里在想什么！？如果真的有一天，我们真的相见了；我们会有怎样的结果呢。。。。。。

我们会相遇吗？

很准，说中我心里的话

最近无聊的作了一些星座测试。这一篇还蛮准的！
最终还是希望遇见对的他，然后一起生活和过着简单又幸福的日子！

三个月内，愿如愿。。。。。。

渐渐冷淡。。。。。。

发现自己渐渐对生活冷淡，发现自己本来很积极的事情；失去了勇气和精神。 过去带给我的欢乐和悲伤，成为我的记号。现在的我，不管做什么事情；都成为标准！

我很伤心时，不会流泪了；我很快乐时，不会大笑了。我很在乎的事情，渐渐淡忘了！
最近再次梦见你，再次期许我们会再见面！我错过的机会太多了，现在很想知道你最近过的好吗？我并没有固定的要求，只是坚持追求那份感觉。

我不知道以后会变成怎样？除了顺其自然，我也希望能更努力一点。多方面的改变，能让事情有所转变。

HK Trip ending

Overall I have a great experience living in HK for 7 weeks. Weekdays we are busy for working for more than 10hours with the HK colleagues. They all are nice and sweet. We meet lots of new people and new friend there. Girls and guys :p We have taste lots of different food and drinks. Never forget that I have eat dim sum for 3 days continously. Wah, now i not dare to eat anymore. But all the prawn was big and fresh. For the 7 weeks I have heard the news of si chuan earthquake. Watch the HK tv news report in depth the number of people past away. That was very sad natural disaster. Then myself get food poisoning for the 2nd week in HK. vomit until nearly pengsan in the room, cannot drink neither food. Haih.....after vomit then diarriea. No choice have to take mc and see doctor in central HK. I stay at Mid levels hotel at central,HK. The area housing was very expansive. Apartment cost MYR4-8Million per unit. Lots of super star and datuk stay near my accomodation area. Can use mid-levels escalator back to hotel. I have been sha tin, sham shui pou, kowloon, jordan, tai zhi, causeway bay, stanley market, tong chung, and others. I almost familiar with all the places to shopping and eating in Hk. Really like the mtr service and environment in HK. Others than the expansive living expenses and raining heavily. before i left hk, there are bird flu virus arise. All the chicken were killed to avoid the bird flu virus spread. Lucky after I back to Kl, HK start to hav taifon! After all, I love this picture overall my trip to HK. Cause that my pleasure to have the best fren ever in my journey.

High school musical

This is disney high school musical stage performance. When I look at them just feel like not real. Haih....I said"If in KL hav high sch musical performance I will buy the ticket and watch".

Oh yeah....dream come true. High sch musical 1+2 ice tour live in bukit jalil stadium. Yo...Mid of Aug I will watch the ice tour live in M'sia. Yeah. I get the lower tier which was just after VIP seat. Yeah...cant wait for the time coming. Sligtly disappointed the 2 main actor not present, the 4 support actor was coming. Ok, not bad at all! Hope the 2 main character will come to M'sia. I wish can see Zac....the blue eye sweet guys!

Macau again

Hahha, come to macau again. This time for active our training visa in HK. We hav to go and the ferry ticket paid by co. No harm to hav a walk over there. The weather is not tat good, going to rain soon. This time macau trip I have ate the Pork chop toast. Toast? Wen i buy left the toast only no more bun. less than 1 hour finished sold out. "Ji Li Pork Chop Bun" really nice and the curry fish ball also taste good too.

Haha..my dessert was durian ice cream, yummy :p
The last not the least was go to shopping for some almond biscuits.

Wat else I have bought...hmmm....raining already. Stop shopping and quickly take the ferry back to HK. Monday have to start busy work in office. What a day :)

Just recover from food poisoning

This picture was look cute, lucky I still can smile to the camere. I remember i just recover from food poisoning. I have been vomit for the whole day and sleep in the hotel. Pengsan already inside my room, even the room cleaner also call me many times for room service.

When i just feel better they all pul me out for jalan jalan at sha tin snoopy garden. The left hand side is same level wit me in office. The right hand side was my lovely manager. When I am sick, she keep telling me to eat plain bread and drink water only for 3 weeks. Haih...I won't be so obedient one. Once she go back to KL, immediately Look for my fren to makan makan liao loh! Roti kosong, no way! Cause I still have my medicine which cost me for HKD820. Sure can control my illness. hahahaha :P

After sha tin we all go to Che Gong Miu. Pray for goodness! But I am soon going to pengsan cos my stomach totally empty and cant fill in anythng at all.

My HK trip

yeah, tat lots of happy and sad thing happen in HK. Firstly, the happiness was the disney trip with my secondary school mates. We have not meet with each other almost 9yrs++. We make lots of fun and laughter here! Specially when we have the indoor roller coaster ride for 2 times. Its really fun. At the end of the day with the 11minutes11seconds disney palace fireworks that was marvelous. This is our memory for Hk Disneyland for the 3rd week I stay in Hk. And getting recover from sickness for the first 2 weeks! See doctor in HK really expansive. I spent HKD820 to see the doctor there! I have 1 weeks illness there! Haih......

Do I still believe what I am believe?

I am the one never believe that obtained degreeholder can be marketable for job hunt. After finish my college studied, I start work in KL. This was my first job as Company Secretarial Junior Assistant with the M'sia Top 10 audit firm company.

Less than 1 years I left the company, the reasons were I am person who are outgoing wish to communicate with people and marketing/management. I like to think and be creative, look for proper changes requirement and always adapt to the society lifestyle. I left the company......I try to explore the other industry. I am like genuine pig walking in KL.

2 months after, I finally joined this financial industry as management trainee. I work for this company for almost 1year6months. I learned a lot, meeting different level of people(from the CEO/vice president level to general clerk), I have went to every corner of the KL and PJ. I even have put myself into danger/stranger, lucky I am still a live until today. I have lost many things, like my car(stolen), housemate(move to penang), and some friends. I gained regret, uncertainty and lost.

I wish to change to another industry, put my wish that more company will open door for me to enter. I finally decide to pursue my degree in UK. I just need to went there for summer program-3 months for 5 subjects(prepare assignment and exam). I meet new friend there and stay at the country which is 7 hours different from M'sia. At that point of time I am feeling like move to another world. Although is 3 months++ only, felt like 3 years over there. The weather was breezing everyday and everynight. I have no problem to prepare for the 5 subjects there and get quite good result. Then I realise my past working experience make me grow a lot to communicate and interact with people. I have met many knowledgeable lectures and the experience they have shared is priceless. I have gained my positive energy and prepare myself to find job in KL again.

I am here in the world top 3 financial/banking company, before that I have in/out for 2 companies. I always tell myself "let's have a try and see what happen then......"! At the end always regret ending to leave the company. Before I choose the recent new company, I hav 2 offers from both side, I receive the good news during chinese new year at my hometown-kk. If they not call me, maybe I not come back to KL already. They give me a call and I have to make the choice. Another company is consultant firm, the salary guaranteed more than RM2500. I din choose it at the end of the day. Because I have to send to Asia Pacific country perform my job function for 3-6months rotately and allocate to new location. I seldom will stay in M'sia, except holiday. That consulting firm is listed in Mesdaq. The training they may provide for me, other people need to spend RM30k to study for the particular professional skills. But I reject......

I like to do management planning and marketing, cause I like to approach people, communicate and public relations. I wan to perform some customer service task, target for the month achievement. I want to prepare quality proposal which can put my ideas in and make it work for the company. I like to presentation to educate/deliver the message to the right candidates. I prefer to participate in the exhibition/trade fair to meet people. I wan to brush up all the skills and knowledge that cant learn from the book. Aih......

Today I really confuse that......who shall I talk to ? Share to? Do I Still Believe What I Believe ALways? Do I still Have the Patience to Wait and See? Do I need to always put myself in Dangers journey back home? Do I? What Shall I Do? Beside now I am temporary become Batman......no more early bird, if I wake up as early bird, I will turn into Panda/owl.

Never ending confuse and lost......

旅行真好！

能够一群人去旅行是件很棒的活动！现在在打工的我，真的需要好好安排假日。希望能有机会点名到香港训练。酱我可以旅行和学习，也可以省钱。
在这间新公司遇见很多怪人，而且还是社会新鲜人。‘没料到’却爱‘口没遮拦’还有‘讲就天下无敌，做就笨手笨脚’。再好的容忍和原谅都有极限！很想说，大部分的菜鸟都用屁股想东西的。
我终于知道，死读书vs活读书的差别。在学业成绩上，死读书的会拿到最好的成绩。活读书的人就成绩一般。在花钱上学，死读书的四眼蛇会赢。
出来社会工作，就是活读书的舞台。因为练得一身好武功--太极，以柔制刚；以刚制柔。做人要圆滑，不要擦鞋！要阵正面思考，不要被负面思考控制。大胆假设，小心求证。不要主观评论，要客观分析。很多道理我们都懂，但是有些人写爱把这些道理放在屁股那里思考。结果道理随着一股屁随时随地放了！剩下的只有便秘多天的屎，然后导致脾气暴躁！这些形容词都不美，正因为这些不像样的菜鸟和老鸟。酱的说法较为贴切！

旅行是心灵最棒的加油站，你的足迹走偏世界各地；接触各种种族的生活态度。把狭窄的胸间放宽，呼吸新鲜空气，人就会精神爽朗；才能创造无限的可能！我的下一站旅行----台湾。正在筹备中，将会在今年10/11月或者明年四月。我相信一定能落实。等筹备足够，就会招兵买马一同去旅行。哈哈！

终于大学毕业了！

终于完成父亲的心愿，毕业于大学学位文凭。相信这是最后一次穿上毕业袍。我已决定了，现在我在KL 的工作，会是最后一份工作。如果工作性质不理想的话。我会搬回家乡了！虽然工作机会和薪水不如大城市。至少可以待在家人的身边会比较快了。在城市的生活，身边的朋友都忙着做工赚钱。并没有生活的素质了。满脑子都只是赚钱。那是对的，因为前对生活很重要。

我很想养狗，自从我的宝贝去世后；已四年了。狗狗仍然是人类的好朋友！猫猫也可以。目前的工作很清闲，都不知道公司是怎样安排工作的！开始觉得自己在浪费时间。所以定了期限就是等到五月，再看上司有什么新的安排。如果一而再的耽搁和理由，我相信到时候是安排搬家的事情了。人一定要知道自己的方向。失去了方向也等于失去了自己！

我又病了。。。

第一天开工，就很不舒服。天没亮就去上班，身体很热；喉咙又疼。我想我是热底的，手脚冰冷；体内却很热。今天真的无法忍受，始终还是要看医生。同样的病历，我已经减少咖啡；多吃水果和合很多开水。但还是没有改善，也许常常睡不好。当家人打电话来问候时，眼泪又忍不住地掉落了；鼻水也掉落。现在的我很软弱，一点精神都没有，FUN细胞死了。回想上一次也是酱的情况，因该是在AIA做工时期。那一次，我连声音都没了；有用写的来和人沟通。连电话都接不到，费了九牛二虎之力；才发出哑哑的声音。朋友还以为打错电话！那时为了几个大公司的策划书，硬着头皮去上班!等到会议完成后，发着高烧的我，眼泪就像现在不受控制的直接滑落。我的老板娘都感到无奈！看来等新工作上了轨道后，我要去报名健身怍运动。以前都是有常作运动身体才没有那么软弱。今天请了病假，希望明天会好一点！明天再努力做工！加油

好的开始，是成功的一半

我希望这是个好的开始。我的朋友都会说：“看你能挨过一个月吗？”听了后很想反驳，但却收回了。因为我知道是我的前科，让他们有酱的想法。我在短短的一个月里，换了两份工作。每一次，遇到挫折时，又会打电话回家和父母说：“我要回来，我在这里很残！” 我妈妈不懂有多开心，但是现在又要让他失望了！因为我还是会在KL做工。在家乡的薪水很少，生活开销很高；根本都没有平衡点。所以有些人做了不为人知的事情，让生活平衡！哈哈！我猜而已。

我的人生就是希望，能经济独立；完全不用依赖父母的支柱。我还希望我能给妈妈零用钱，买她喜欢的东西。也希望能带妈妈出国旅行，她带我去了很多次中国。还记得我问她：“为什么，你那么爱去中国？”结果她说：“因为我不会别的国家语言啊！所以要靠你带我去了！”妈妈的学历只有小学六年级，因为已故的外公重男轻女；所以妈妈没有机会继续念书。

我很希望能够带妈妈去swisszerland，那是个环境非常优美洁净的好地方。人的一生将因此而重生！我很想去台湾，但是却去了英国和欧洲。目前为止依然没变就是，终有一天我会去日本东京看樱花、富良野的薰依草、台湾的夜市、阿里山、九分，Florida的DisneyLand。

所以现在要有个稳定的工作，储蓄了钱。每一年都要出国旅行！依我的能力，就算无法从事我的理想行业，我也可以自得其乐！更加明白，人生并没办法如愿以偿，所以尽量不要转牛角尖；转个弯、退一步，人生又再次圆满！

芳芳的2008年崭新计划的理想

2008年，新的一年；新的计划和成长。为什么，新的一年；我选了这日落的图像？我相信日不落（蔡依林的歌），因为不管什么时候；陷入低潮期我的心要像太阳一样发光发热！最近还是没办法找到我要得工作。不是环境不佳、无所事事、就是骗局！很多朋友也和我一样，但不是有这样的同伴就可以放弃自己。每一天都努力为自己打气是必然的，目标要清晰和不含糊。今天我严格选择我的工作，是为了几年后的我铺路。因为我知道再过几年，我就没有机会尝试不同领域的工作。再过几年，是工作选我；而不是我选工作。所以现在不是随便有工作就好。骑牛找马，说的容易；行动难！所谓不可三心两意。一旦找到了理想工作，就要专心工作。每一年，我都会在这里；写下我的新年愿望和计划！好了，又是发梦的时间到了。哦！不可以发梦，要言行做起。

芳芳的2008年崭新计划的理想：
1。坚持我的理想工作 （然后渐渐成为事业）
2。学习新电脑课程 （如：Adobe Photoshop, Microsoft Office)
3。年度出国旅行 （台湾）
4。学习新外语 （日语和英语，最近发现自己的中文也很烂了）
5。我要换新手机 （Sony Erricson/LG/Nokia)
6。储蓄 （年度薪水的40%）
〈完毕〉

以上都是基本的计划，看是简单；但是却无法坚持到底和实现。
爱情这个问题吗？随缘；因为没有期望就不会失望。不会失望就不会放弃想爱。

芳的座右铭：相信自己的力量，凡是应顺其自然！